I’m not quite sure my boyfriend knew what he was getting into when he began dating me. He knew I was a writer, but I doubt he was prepared for all the things that come along with dating a writer. Five years later, he’s now a veteran to my writing spirit, from massaging my tired fingers, and reading the stories I frantically email him at 3 a.m. Unprepared or not, he was somehow willing to stick around and deal with what dating a writer entails.
Dating a writer is a unique experience; it’s not unlike dating an artist, but vastly different from dating someone who does not partake in what I’ll call the “classic arts” (as I rather refuse to call someone who is a STEM major, for example, uncreative). Dating a writer is fantastic, enchanting, exhausting and simply out of this world.
Here are some of the signs you’re dating a writer:
1. They write to you a lot
Whether it be letters, post-it notes, little poems scrawled in ink upon your skin, your writer will be writing to you whenever they get the chance. Don’t be surprised if these letters come in iambic pentameter. We have an insatiable desire to write, to grow, to create and you’re the perfect one to receive our ponderings.
2. They write about you a lot
Don’t be surprised to see yourself manifested in poetry, in anecdotes for articles, as characters, into plotlines. Don’t be shocked to find features of you—whether it be your love for classical music or big ears—sprinkled across their writing, leaving bits of you here and there because writers will carry you wherever they go.
3. They’ll analyze you to the core
Who are you? That’s what they’ll ask. Even after months, years even of knowing you. What else lurks under your skin? Even after years of knowing a character, we still learn new things about them every day and while you’re not a character, you’re just as fascinating as a character. As our characters inhabit our minds, slipping into our thoughts, you do as well, so don’t be surprised if we analyze everything from the way you walk to the way you eat. All good things, I promise!
4. They’ll analyze your encounters
And probably write long, detailed passages digesting every bit, from the chat you had in the morning to your intimate moments.
5. Nothing makes them happier than paper, pens, ink and notebooks
6. Ditto for books and bookstores
Got any birthday ideas, yet?
7. Their apologies will be extremely sincere
Like any couple, you may have spats. You may argue and declare that this is the end. However, know that when you make up, our apology will come wrapped in an envelope, inked in your favorite color, tear drops splattering the page. And that apology will have exhausted us, but it’s sincere and it’s real. Writers are always sincere when it comes to apologizing.
8. They’ll love you more deeply than any other person
And why is that? That’s because we know you. We’ve seen what’s inside of you. We’ve invested precious ink and paper in you. If we’ve been with you long enough to write you long soliloquys during class and wake up in the middle of the night to jot down a note to you, then know it’s real. We’ve fallen deeply in love with you and we will be your best lover.